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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29948415">What If I Fall</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/LindtLuirae/pseuds/LindtLuirae'>LindtLuirae</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Naruto</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>ANBU Captain Raidou, ANBU Legacy fanfiction, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Internal Conflict, M/M, Medic-nin Genma, Mutual Pining, POV Alternating, Porn with Feelings, Tension, Unbeta’d we die like (wo)men, but can be read anyway</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-03-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-03-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-16 00:27:43</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>6,491</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29948415</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/LindtLuirae/pseuds/LindtLuirae</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>It felt like they have been dancing at the edge of this cliff for a lifetime, flirting with dangerous heights, eager to crash and fall.</p><p>Raidou chose, once more today, to fall.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Namiashi Raidou/Shiranui Genma</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>9</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>40</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>What If I Fall</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I wrote this more than a year ago, in Feb last year to be exact, and totally chickened out of sharing it. But here it is and I sincerely hope you like it.</p><p>This fic takes place in the ANBU Legacy verse, an ongoing Naruto series, but can be read independently. <a href="https://anbulegacy.com/toc/#prologues">ANBU Legacy</a> is my favourite—and by that I mean top of the list. Top of <em>any</em> list. In so many way, it kind of changed my life. Can’t recommend it enough. </p><p>If you haven’t read Legacy all you need to know to read this fic is that Raidou is Genma’s ANBU Captain and has strict rules about romantic/sexual relationships between teammates. Except he and Genma are attracted to each other and they both know it, so it’s a matter of Raidou allowing himself to let go. </p><p>Without further ago, enjoy!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Walking Genma home was probably not Raidou’s brightest idea, he could admit that to himself. </p><p>It flirted too closely with the simmering temptation in his gut, one that was growing more prominent and harder to ignore with every passing day. But Raidou was faintly buzzed and warmed from the alcohol in his system, the wind sweeping pleasantly through his hair and Genma’s presence at his side was... thrilling. It filled him with a strange bubbling energy that put a little skip in his stride, and etched a smile on his face.</p><p>He wasn’t drunk. Not even remotely. But all the tension in his body had loosened, leaving behind pliant muscles, and lungs that breathed easier. Even Raidou’s iron grip on his self control wilted a little in the face of spending a few more moments with this man, soaking in his infectious happiness and the way the setting sun turned his skin golden.</p><p>It was just that sometimes Raidou looked at Genma and forgot how to breathe. Like now, with his hair swept back in a loose bun, stray tendrils framing his face, and his lips smiling, something small and secret and quietly <em> pleased.</em> He hummed a tune under his breath, faintly melodic and sweet and Raidou found himself wondering if Genma could sing. </p><p>And then he found himself studying the golden hue lighting up his eyes, the tentative red suffusing his cheeks, the small criss-cross scar at the slope of his jawline beneath his ear, his lips that were perpetually tugged up at the corner in Raidou’s presence, but parted to take a bite of dango with relish... Raidou swallowed, wrenching his eyes away from the vision of Genma soaked in sunlight and munching on sweets and looking like a goddamn fantasy come to life.</p><p>The dango box came into view and Raidou looked down to find Genma’s hand raised invitingly. “Want some?” he grinned. </p><p>I want <em> you </em>. Raidou swallowed that down and buried it with all his other urges. He accepted a dango stick and attempted a smile, “Thanks.”</p><p>Maybe it was knowing that Genma wanted him too. </p><p>‘I would kiss you—both of you—if you wanted me to.’ He had said. Raidou wished it was just kissing that he longed to do to Genma. Wished it was just something curious and niggling that he could satisfy with a press of lips. </p><p>There were parts of Raidou that he couldn’t silence, that wanted Genma laid out on the sheets, hair fanning out across the pillows and lips crying out Raidou’s name as he brought him over the edge again and again. There were parts of Raidou that wanted to defile that clever mouth, that wanted Genma on his knees, that wanted him stuffed with his—</p><p>Raidou drew in a shaky breath, clamping down on the thoughts until they sunk back into the darkest corners of his soul. They were easy to ignore only sometimes, because looking at Genma reminded him that he would take as much as was appropriate and settle for this friendship that he would fight and bleed for. It wasn’t all just lust. He liked Genma. Hell, maybe in another lifetime he would have dated Genma. </p><p>But right now he <em> wanted </em> Genma. Right now Genma had brushed off advances from people in the pub because he was with Raidou. Right now Genma chose <em> him.</em> </p><p>Raidou hated himself in silence for a few moments until Genma’s shoulder knocked companionably against his. “You’re thinking so loud I can almost hear it.”</p><p>Raidou took another breath before he faced him. “I’m fine.”</p><p>Genma arched an eyebrow, the small gesture ridiculously attractive. “Are you?”</p><p>“Yep, just,” Raidou exhaled slowly again. “Some loud thoughts.”</p><p>Genma looked faintly intrigued but didn’t push. That was the nice thing about Genma, he never pried or pushed, and he respected Raidou’s boundaries. </p><p>The forest grew a little denser out here, less homes and more warehouses. They would be parting soon. </p><p>Raidou’s fingers itched. </p><p>Perhaps a single kiss? Surely kissing Genma wouldn’t ruin months of fluidly working together, or strain this friendship. Genma had already announced <em> he </em> would be fine with it, and that he was willing to talk about it. </p><p>“Hey Genma, can I—“ the words were out of his mouth before he could stop them, and he immediately clamped his jaw shut.</p><p>Genma perked up. “What?”</p><p><em> Fuck.</em> Fuck, fuck, fuck. </p><p>Raidou swallowed thickly, slowing down as they approached the stairway leading up to Genma’s doorstep. “Nothing… sorry, I should think before I speak.”</p><p>“It’s okay, you know you can tell me whatever,” Genma turned to smile at him, understanding and sweet.</p><p>Perhaps in another lifetime he would have invited him in for tea. Today, he reached out to gently pat Raidou’s shoulder.</p><p>“Thanks for walking me home.” He looked so inviting, sincere eyes the colour of honey, bathed in the glow of the setting sun. Temptation coated Raidou’s tongue like poison.</p><p>“You don’t have to thank me, you’re good company.” The words were a little thick on his tongue, genuine but not the ones he truly wanted to say.</p><p>Genma chuckled, and a blush deepened the colour of his cheeks, which was almost too much in itself, but then he had to follow it with: “Good. Because you’re my favorite person to hang out with.”</p><p>Raidou’s heart started racing. <em> Just once, just</em>... </p><p>He didn’t know exactly how he would justify this later beyond <em> I want this</em>, and <em> I don’t want to resist it anymore</em>, and <em> I’m tired of pretending I’m not head over heels for you</em>. He stepped closer to Genma, whose eyes widened a little as Raidou’s hands slowly came up to frame his face. Raidou watched him for any sign of hesitation, and found only anticipation in the way Genma’s eyes roamed his face, liquid honey in the waning sunlight.</p><p>Raidou knew he was done for.</p><p> </p><hr/><p><br/>Genma had stopped breathing somewhere there between their diminishing proximity and Raidou’s touch. </p><p>Warm breath rolled over his chin as Raidou leaned closer, eyes hooded. “Sorry but I’m going to kiss you now... so stop me if...” </p><p><em> Please don’t wake up</em>, Genma thought to himself as he leaned into Raidou’s palms and moments later, met the plushness of lips with his own.</p><p>Something stuttered inside him, and almost burst. He had wanted this for <em> months</em>—his breath trembled over an involuntary exhale, just at the thought—it was finally happening now. </p><p>If someone asked him later what he was thinking he honestly wouldn’t have been able to remember. All he knew was that for a moment there were soft lips, strong palms anchoring him and blissfully silent thoughts.</p><p>Raidou was careful, controlled, as his lips pressed over Genma’s, his tongue gently gliding over his lower lip... Genma found himself feeling dizzy with the strain of holding back, matching that slow pace breath for breath.</p><p>Raidou tasted like alcohol and cinnamon, and kissed like he planned to dissolve Genma through his mouth alone. </p><p>It was working.</p><p>When he pulled back, Genma chased him, knees weak. The dango box dropped to the ground, momentarily forgotten, and Genma wound his arms around Raidou’s neck, not giving him the chance to fully back away.</p><p>Their lips met again, a crash this time, not like the gentle wave they just crested, but more like a tsunami overturning a mountain. </p><p>Raidou <em> moaned.</em></p><p><em> Oh gods,</em> Genma thought a little wildly, and wished he could imprint his taste on his tongue. He never wanted it to end, but he didn’t want to push—he clutched at Raidou’s shoulders, hoping he could somehow translate that without words. If only Raidou would just—</p><p>Raidou ripped his mouth away with a little gasp, face flushed and lungs heaving. His fingers clutched Genma’s biceps and squeezed tight. “Wait— I need— Just a moment—“</p><hr/><p><em> Fuck</em>. Genma had no right to look so pretty. He looked almost irresistible when he was so thoroughly kissed and ruffled, red mouth and heaving breaths, looking barely held at the seams.</p><p>“Sorry,” Genma muttered, but didn’t pull away from him. He looked down instead, and took a calming breath. “I’m just— Sorry. I didn’t mean to push.”</p><p>Raidou shook his head, trying to calm his heart and lungs and the violent butterflies in his gut. “No I’m sorry, I shouldn't have just—out of nowhere.”</p><p>Genma swallowed audibly. “Please don’t be sorry I’ve wanted this for so long.”</p><p>Raidou could say the same. </p><p>Genma wasn’t looking at him yet. And knowing him he was probably concocting some stupid reason to why Raidou wouldn’t want to continue kissing him. Raidou kind of felt like an asshole. </p><p>He racked his brain for something appropriate to say, for a way to remove that little hunch from Genma’s shoulders, and the burning feeling of something like regret from his gut. His palms smoothen up and down across Genma’s biceps, squeezing gently.</p><p>“You probably think I’m an asshole,” Raidou said softly, “I’m not trying to lead you on I’m... I’m just...” </p><p>Words failed him. </p><p>Genma looked up with a self-deprecating smile, “Don’t want to give into me?”</p><p>“Don’t want to <em> lose you,</em>” Raidou stressed. </p><p>A strange expression flitted over Genma’s features, one Raidou couldn’t quite decipher. “Raidou it’s not— it <em> wouldn’t </em> be like that. Whatever might happen, do you really think it will undo months of working and bleeding together?”</p><p>“What if it did? Is it worth destroying what we have right now?”</p><p>Raidou wasn’t sure if he was looking to get convinced by Genma or was trying to convince Genma anymore.</p><p>Genma’s skin was surprisingly smooth at the shoulders, contrasting with the rougher scar-littered arms. He quivered minutely under Raidou’s touch but otherwise seemed content to stay there within arm’s reach. “What if a million things,” Gemma shook his head, “What if it’s the best thing we ever do? What if one of us dies next week and regrets it? What if this is exactly what needs to happen? We could what if all day long.” Somewhere in his impassioned rant Genma had clutched the hem of Raidou’s shirt within his fingers. “I keep trying to hold on, you keep trying to let go, just... try to meet me in the middle sometime. See where it takes us. Nothing under this sun would make me hate you. I like to think I’m a good man—what we do for a career notwithstanding—and so are you. We’re adults. We can talk it out until it makes sense.”</p><p>Genma ran out of fuel towards the end. His teeth clicked shut. He took a broken breath.</p><p>Raidou wanted to cradle him in his arms and make it okay. </p><p>He wished it was just lust he felt for Genma. Perhaps then this would be easier, perhaps then he could sort through this messy tangle of thoughts and feelings. </p><p>Instead he was left with a stabbing pain in his heart, and longing in his fingers and little wants he couldn’t silence. He wanted to kiss Genma again. He wanted to feel those soft caramel strands between his fingers. He wanted Genma close enough to hear his heartbeats. </p><p>But was it worth potentially <em> not </em> having Genma one day? The thought was terrifying and nauseating.</p><p><em> He could die and you won’t have him then either</em>, a part of Raidou’s brain chimed morbidly in support. </p><p>They were left at Genma’s doorstep staring at each other in a silent battle of wills. </p><p>As if sensing Raidou’s disintegrating composure, Genma latched onto the cracks in his will. “I promise you nothing will compromise the way I work with you. Not from my side. Not ever. I won’t let <em> you </em> mess that up. Hell I’d perfect my taijutsu just to kick your ass if you dare.”</p><p>Raidou found himself smiling helplessly. Genma always had that simmering fire in his eyes that surfaced at random intervals, beautiful like many other things about him. Dyed with the setting sun he just looked breathtaking, fighting to keep Raidou to himself. “You better perfect your taijutsu either way,” he chuckled, an unnamable something settling inside him.</p><p>He couldn’t doubt Genma’s conviction. And he was tired of doubting himself.</p><p>“Yessir,” Genma grinned, tentatively at first, and then widening as Raidou made no move to leave. “...want to come in for a cup of tea now? I can knock some more sense into your skull then.”</p><p>“Very charming. You’re such a sweet talker, anyone tell you that?” </p><p>Genma laughed, ringing and happy and reached to clasp Raidou’s hands in his own. “Only for you.”</p><hr/><p>Genma couldn’t quite believe what was happening, and didn’t want to get his hopes up <em> too </em> much but Raidou was following him into the warehouse, <em> still holding his hand,</em> and it was hard to contain the excited uprise of his heartbeat.</p><p>They went into the kitchen for the promised tea, and Raidou was <em> blushing, </em>which melted parts of Genma’s brain altogether.</p><p>He had to regretfully let go of Raidou’s grip on him to set the kettle boiling, and if it was possible, the tension doubled with the distance, as if the titillating space allowed for all the longing to fester a little longer.</p><p>Genma chewed on the inside of his lip and wished he had a senbon with him. Raidou watched him from his perch against the edge of the table, fingers drumming across his thigh, his fathomless eyes trained on Genma.</p><p>The impulse to touch his still tingling lips grew, to exponential levels, and with it the urge to do it again. His foot tapped against the ground, unsureness and anticipation melding together in a nervous outlet.</p><p>What now?</p><p>Raidou opened his mouth, seemed to think better of it, and shut it again.</p><p>Fuck it.</p><p>Genma took the three wide steps it took to bring him to Raidou, grabbed his face and planted a kiss on the corner of his mouth. “There! Broke the ice. You can <em> talk </em> now.”</p><p>Raidou looked dumbfounded for exactly three seconds, before he burst into a fit of chuckles that had Genma’s whole face burning. “You’re fucking <em> adorable</em>,” he said through laughter that watered his eyes, and grabbed Genma’s blushing face in his palms. “I was just waiting for the tea.”</p><p>Genma tried to swallow down embarrassment and a few choice words about exactly how <em> adorable </em> he could be. “Screw you I’m not adorable, I’m sexy.”</p><p>Raidou was <em> still </em> chuckling. “You are, you are,” he agreed, visibly trying to calm himself down. He took one shaky breath, composed himself, and let his thumbs trace Genma’s cheekbones. “Sorry, I guess I’m nervous.”</p><p>The admission, although it shouldn’t have been surprising, still managed to knock the breath out of Genma with its vulnerability. </p><p>“Maybe I am too,” he said, and watched the way Raidou’s eyes roamed his face again and again, “nothing wrong with being nervous.”</p><p>“No,” he agreed softly, “everything wrong with wanting you though.”</p><p>Genma swallowed against a dry throat, wet his lips, “it can’t be all that wrong since I want you too.”</p><p>“Perhaps,” Raidou agreed again, quiter, closing his eyes and leaning into Genma, who was fully expecting another kiss but what he got instead was the feeling of Raidou’s forehead touching his own and then, over a soft exhale, one more confession: “What kind of person does it make me to set up rules and break them?”</p><p>The heat of Raidou’s body this close fogged up Genma’s mind but he tried, for Raidou’s sake, to focus. “No rules against updating a rule though. And that rule was pretty outdated if you ask me.”</p><p>Raidou chuckled again, warm breath against Genma’s chin. There was only so much self control one could exercise here. Genma tilted his head, his nose brushing Raidou’s as he sought out his mouth for a gentle kiss. “Try?”</p><p>Raidou’s mouth moved against his own in response, one arm snaking around him, big palm flattening over the small of his back and drawing him closer. </p><p>This close there was heat, and taste and the smell of spice and alcohol and everything Raidou. Genma wound his arms around broad shoulders and hoped it would last for a bit longer. </p><p>A lot longer. Ideally forever. Genma’s thoughts were rapidly dissolving into a muddled mess. Soon he gave up on forming thoughts at all.</p><p>Raidou’s face tilted, Genma reciprocated, and felt teeth grazing gently over his lower lips. He made an involuntary sound, already hopelessly lost in all the sensations, and parted his lips for Raidou’s expert tongue to delve into. He nearly moaned at the way Raidou used it to slowly fuck his mouth, as if Genma’s desirous thoughts weren’t already careening off track and threatening to end in a train-wreck. </p><p>He wasn’t going to push, he firmly reminded himself. </p><p>But Raidou bit his lower lip between his teeth, which derailed Genma entirely. </p><p>“Fuck,” he said breathlessly, when Raidou let go of him and leaned back to survey him. “You’re going to kill me.”</p><p>Raidou’s arms locked around Genma’s middle. “Not if you kill me first.”</p><p>Genma laughed, although it did nothing to cool him down. </p><p>“What do you want?” Raidou asked with intent, fingers messaging into the hard muscles under his touch. </p><p>Genma’s eyes nearly rolled back. He shut them firmly and worked against the influx of words that wanted to tumble out of his mouth. Like, <em> I want you naked, and in my bed, but I’m also happy to just kiss you for a few lifetimes.  </em></p><p>“What do <em> you </em> want?” Genma tried instead.</p><p>Lips trailed over his jawline. “A lot of things. Too many things. Not all of them are innocent.”</p><p>Genma was starting to breathe faster—he tried not to be embarrassed by that. “Like what?”</p><p>Raidou’s tongue left a burning trail down his neck, and Genma choked down a moan. “Do you really want to know?” </p><p>“<em>Yes</em>,” Genma’s fingers dug into delightfully solid shoulders and wondered if the fire growing inside him would be the end of him.</p><p>Raidou nibbled on the sensitive skin over his pulse, earning a pleased sigh. “I want to know what you sound like,” Raidou’s rich baritone sunk right under his skin, “what you taste like, all the things that make you writhe…” lips closed over his earlobe and sucked, making Genma’s whole body shiver, “the feeling of your skin, what lights you up…”</p><p><em> Shit,</em> Genma thought hazily, effortlessly turned on by a few words, but they were coated with Raidou’s own desires and to be desired by Raidou was… their lips met again, sending Genma’s heart rate on a crescendo. Everything felt too vivid, too big, and yet not remotely enough.</p><p>Raidou’s fingers found the skin under his shirt, tracing the ridges of his abdominals, thumb briefly dipping into his naval. A touch so simple wouldn’t normally elicit such powerful sensations in Genma, but he still felt muscles shiver under Raidou’s fingertips, threatening that even this little was too much and he was doomed. </p><p>His hands, no longer happy to sit idle, sunk under Raidou’s clothes to explore too. Scarred skin met his touch, rippling muscles heaving under his palms. He felt exquisite, solid and hard and warm, Genma ached to touch every other inch and see if he felt the same everywhere else.</p><hr/><p>Raidou spared a moment to wonder about the usually controlled and strict part of himself that was strangely silent now and whatever happened to it, but that was all it was. A moment. Ultimately and thoroughly crippled by the feeling of Genma’s body trying its best to rip the breath from his lungs. </p><p>Want was such a dangerous fire, temptation even more damning. Take a little and you’d want more. Know you could take more and you wouldn’t be able to stop. Genma was a drug and Raidou was hooked. </p><p>Little by little, self-control disintegrated under the growing fire in his loins; hands that touched with reverence now groped with need. Genma’s little gasps coiled him like a string, the taste of his skin addicting. Raidou was lost, thoughts silent, filled with such a primitive want all he could do was buck against Genma’s squirming hips and pant in his unfulfilled desires. </p><p>Genma pushed at Raidou’s chest, and Raidou found himself sprawling back on the dinner table, shirt riding up, and burning under Genma’s gaze. </p><p>Genma was breathing heavily, a red flush dusting his face, his eyes heavy-lidded, scorching caramel traversing Raidou’s body. Hands gripped Raidou’s hips and Genma leaned over, hair falling messily over his shoulders, bun ruined. “Gods, you’re such a fucking dream.”</p><p>Genma reached over him, lithe like a cat and Raidou rose to meet him in a slow, wet kiss that tasted like Genma and the promise for so much more. </p><p>Fingers fumbled with his belt, unbuckled it, popped the button, skimmed down the zipper. Raidou could barely breathe as he felt hands fluttering over his clothed erection and tried not to grind against the touch.</p><p>Genma moved lower, leaving a burning trail down his torso, then pressed his mouth to Raidou’s hip bone. Raidou nearly groaned, especially when Genma tugged down the elastic of his boxers and freed his cock, his lips fluttering over the hot flesh next.</p><p>Raidou found those caramel strands and sank his fingers through them, cupping the back of Genma’s head and attempted to breathe.</p><p>It gasped out of him, when Genma’s mouth closed around the head and sucked ever-so- lightly. A tease, more than anything.</p><p>There were many things he still wanted to say. But he was exhausted from warring with himself, desperate for the pleasure of Genma’s touch, so in need of just letting go and taking what he wanted for once. </p><p>Genma was such a vision from his place between Raidou’s thighs, lips wrapped around his cock and hair tickling his abdomen. Raidou wanted him so badly it made every part of him ache with things that had nothing to do with arousal and everything to do with the man that stirred it. </p><p>He caressed those strands again, cradled Genma’s head, then framed his jaw and guided him, watching every inch disappear behind pink lips and reappear slick with spit. It made him arch, and his hips bucked into the open heat of Genma’s mouth. </p><p>He wanted more. He wanted Genma on his knees, he wanted Genma sprawled out under him so wracked in pleasure his eyes rolled back.</p><p>He wanted Genma to know what he was getting himself into. There was a desperation now, to show him exactly what Raidou liked to do to the men he fucked. </p><p>Testily, he bucked harder into Genma’s mouth, and groaned when he hit the back of his throat.</p><p>Genma’s caramel depths peered into his, as if in challenge. His hand stroked up and down Raidou’s shaft as he eased back for breath. “Tell me what you want.”</p><p>Raidou took a shuddering breath, Genma’s callouses dragging over the smooth skin of his cock, fanning the flames inside him to dangerous levels.</p><p>“I want you,” Raidou sounded strangled. Fueled by growing arousal, the thoughts tumbled out unfiltered. “I want you. I want to fuck your throat. I want to know what you feel like inside. I want to make you come all over yourself.” </p><p>Genma breathing was still ragged but he groaned and ducked to take Raidou’s cock again. Raidou tugged hard on his hair and thrust up, it made Genma growl and gag a little but he held steady, took him down inch by inch until Raidou forgot how to breathe, until nothing mattered but this moment, and this feeling, and all the things that were to come. </p><p>“Shit, you look so good like this,” Raidou caressed the tense jaw working to accommodate his girth. “Kami, look at you…”</p><p>Genma took him farther back his throat, until his eyes watered and Raidou’s self control nearly snapped. </p><p>He tugged so hard at Genma’s hair he was afraid he took some of it out by accident. His hips thrust, bolder now, slipping in and out of Genma’s throat. </p><p>Genma didn’t even flinch, he held his mouth steady for a moment, and just let Raidou use it to pleasure himself. It was so incredibly sexy Raidou’s loins flared with white hot arousal watching wet lips part around him with every thrust, accommodating, eager, wanting.</p><p>Raidou rose, slid an inch off the counter to plant his feet on the ground. Genma went with him, lowering on his knees. This way Raidou had more freedom to move, to dominate. </p><p>He gathered Genma’s loose strands in a ponytail, took a shuddering breath as Genma’s tongue swirled around him.</p><p>It took him a moment to notice Genma’s other hand was down his pants.</p><p>“<em>Fuck</em>, are you touching yourself?” </p><p>Genma’s eyes, blown wide at the pupils and infinitely darker, rose to meet his. He tried to nod around Raidou’s cock, and choked a little as Raidou slipped deeper. </p><p>Raidou wanted to ravish him. </p><p>He grabbed at the hollows of his throat and held him still, keeping his cock further down his throat. </p><p>Genma shuddered, gagged a little, but still held unflinchingly even when his throat tightened.</p><p>“Take it out, show me your cock,” Raidou gritted, eased back for a moment and then thrust in again. Genma still wasn’t moving, only sucking eagerly, only taking what Raidou was giving him.</p><p>It made Raidou dizzy.</p><p>The hand in Genma’s pants moved to unbutton and unzip his trousers, and then dipped behind the elastic of his boxers to tug out his erection. He was hard and slightly curved and deep red at the head and <em> Raidou wanted him. </em></p><p>He threw his head back and groaned, sinking all the way down Genma’s throat yet again. </p><p>Genma was drooling around him, his jaw undoubtedly sore, his throat undoubtedly raw. The little sounds he was making as he took Raidou made it very hard not to fall apart. </p><p>His hand stroked his cock in rhythm to Raidou’s hips, steady and relentless. </p><p>He pulled off eventually, out of breath, his other hand moving to fist Raidou at the base and stroke in rhythm with his hand on himself. “Do you want to come?” Genma asked a little hoarsely.</p><p>“Do you want me to?” The air felt too hot, charged and heavy with their combined arousal and impending orgasms. </p><p>Genma’s mouth tugged up. “Not without you inside me.”</p><p>Raidou hissed, the words going straight to his loins. He pulled Genma up for a searing kiss, replacing Genma’s hand on his cock with his own and rubbed him.</p><p>He was so hard, and he made noises, breathless and arousing, as Raidou returned the favour. </p><p>Eventually Genma pulled back to remove the bubbling kettle before they left the kitchen. </p><p> </p><p>They made it into the bedroom somehow—the bedroom they built together, the walls they put up and the bed they assembled.</p><p>Somehow it felt like he belonged here as much as Genma.</p><p>Somehow that made it easier to fully let go.</p><hr/><p>Genma’s shirt stood no chance against Raidou and was lost somewhere on the floor before they’d even made it halfway inside the room. Now Genma reached across Raidou’s back and tugged off his shirt in reciprocation. </p><p>Raidou’s rougher side had made an appearance but now it seemed to have slunk back into the shadows. There was a deliberate gentleness as he pushed him down on the bed and straddled him with his hips.</p><p>He always enjoyed looking at Raidou, but lying down the way they were, it made him lose his breath having that muscular weight looming over him, broad shoulders and a chiseled jaw taking up his entire vision.</p><p>Genma pushed himself up on his elbows, lips latching onto the skin of Raidou’s collarbones. He tasted like sweat and salt and Genma was so hard it hurt. </p><p>Raidou made a growling noise in his throat as Genma's teeth grazed the tendons in his neck, not quite biting, just denting the skin. Raidou clutched at his hip, thumb dragging over the hard bone and pressed down.</p><p>They slotted seamlessly together, hot and hard, and Genma's whole body coiled at the feeling of Raidou—it was a dream to have him this close, a part of him was simply basking in the closeness and intimacy of skin against skin and breath for breath.</p><p>Raidou took a shuddering one as he rocked against Genma, friction and slickness leaving them both heady and flushed. It took some effort to work up words, even thoughts, but Genma reached around Raidou and clasped the back of his neck, their foreheads pressing together.</p><p>"Do you want this?" Genma strained, panting against the growing desire building up inside him. "Are you sure this is what you want?"</p><p>Raidou's breath burned against his jaw, "Y<em>es</em>," he ground harder against Genma. "Want you, just you."</p><p>Genma laughed, breathless and lightheaded. "Okay, good, because if you don't get inside me right now I think I'm going to die."</p><p>It was Raidou's turn to let out a laugh, somewhat strangled. "I think I'm going to die <em> when </em> I get inside you."</p><hr/><p>Genma's thighs flexed back, and his ankles hooked at the waistband of Raidou's jeans. There was a flexibility there Raidou wanted to explore someday, a wiriness he'd witnessed in their early morning stretches. But he was too keyed up right then, strung so tight it was uncomfortable.</p><p>Having Genma this close, on the brink of being one with him, it stripped the breath from his lungs and left behind a burning fire to spread and consume. When Genma finished helping him out of his jeans, Raidou kicked them off and set on liberating Genma of his.</p><p>Hips arched up in assistance, and in the space of a few seconds, he had Genma lying there on the sheets, naked and glorious, long lean torso a collection of scattered scars and rippling muscles. Raidou mustered up some self-control and took a few moments to watch the mouthwatering stretch of Genma's body on the pale sheets.</p><p>His arms were thrown back over his head, waiting, anticipating, his hair a mess of golden strands in the waning sunlight slipping through the glass windows. The light painted him in an ethereal glow, glimmered off the caramel pools of his eyes and dissolved Raidou's next breath before it left his lungs.</p><p>Riveted, he reached to drag his palms down the contours of Genma's abdominals, feeling every dip and valley and committing to memory the feeling of scarred and smooth skin contrasting under his fingertips.</p><p>Genma reached for his bedside drawer and withdrew a bottle of lube. Raidou took it from him, the ache starting anew at the excitement of what was about to come.</p><p>It felt like they have been dancing at the edge of this cliff for a lifetime, flirting with dangerous heights, eager to crash and fall.</p><p>Raidou chose, once more today, to fall.</p><p>After all, he had Genma's green glowing hands to soothe the aches and put him back together, and Genma's steady hold to anchor him, and Genma's beautiful body to take him. There was no reason to be scared or hesitant.</p><p>Genma's face was open and expressive as Raidou worked two digits into him, slick and slippering into tight heat and clenching muscles. He could have watched him like this forever, heaving chest and soft moans and perspiration at the arch of his brow. Undulating against Raidou because he was needy too, because he wanted to fall apart, because he wanted Raidou and he was going to have him.</p><p>The strain in his cock reached unbearable levels.</p><p>Genma's eyes had gone half-lidded and hazy, body shivering and shuddering slightly every time Raidou's fingers glanced against his prostate.</p><p>Raidou withdrew his fingers. Genma held his breath.</p><p>He took a moment to slick himself up and then tossed the lube bottle aside. Genma's thighs rose again, and his ankles crossed at Raidou's back. "Okay?" Genma asked hoarsely.</p><p>Raidou pressed their mouths together in answer. He nudged his cock against Genma's entrance and then inch by inch, he breached the heat of that sinful body.</p><p>Genma gasped against his mouth, clutched at his shoulders and took him all the way in.</p><p>It felt impossible to draw a breath. Raidou couldn't think for a moment, caught up in the feeling of stuttering muscles around him and Genma's taste on his tongue and Genma's sounds in his mouth.</p><p>"Oh gods," Genma gasped, wet lips straying from Raidou's lips to press against his cheek as he held them pressed together. He seemed to need a moment to center himself.</p><p>Raidou's elbows pressed on either side of his head and waited, patiently, for Genma's body to accept his. Genma's muscles clenched hard again, squeezing Raidou mercilessly. It tore a groan from the depths of his chest. "D-don't," he shuddered. "don't do that. I won't last."</p><p>Genma laughed, the sound breathy and cracking with too many emotions and not enough oxygen. The heels of his feet nudged Raidou's ass, urging him to move against him and Raidou complied, hips easing back and then sinking inside Genma again.</p><p>They both let out matching stuttering breaths as Raidou repeated the motion, again, and again. Raidou gripped Genma's thighs, muscular and lean in his hands and pushed them back as he straightened to his knees to watch the magnificent sprawl of Genma's body.</p><p>Reading his mind, Genma reached for the pillow behind him, snagged it unseeingly and passed it to Raidou, who helped him support his hips. They fell into a rhythm again, Genma's hips canting up, Raidou's pushing forward to meet him, both panting.</p><p>There were too many things to focus on and take in, to commit to memory and to admire. Like the way Genma's breath caught every time Raidou pressed as deeply into him as he could, balls slapping against his ass. Like the way his head fell back every time Raidou's thrusts sped up, leaving them both a mess of slick skin and broken noises.</p><p>"Fuck, you're so beautiful," Raidou marvelled, reaching to stroke Genma's cock in tandem with his thrusts.</p><p>Genma keened, and his back arched off the bed. He was the most enticing sight Raidou had ever laid eyes on. "Oh—my god," Genma shuddered hard and clawed at the sheets. "Oh, kami—oh fuck."</p><p>He thrust up against Raidou’s touch and the sight of him was enough to burn and dissolve Raidou to his most primal self.</p><p>"You like that, huh?" Raidou's hips slammed harder against him, and his wrist flicked with his next stroke. "<em>Fuck</em>, I want to ruin you."</p><p>Genma's breathing was rough and rapid—his eyes squeezed shut as another shudder wracked his frame. "<em>Do it</em>— do it— fucking ruin me I can take it, <em> fuck</em>."</p><p>Raidou tightened his hold on Genma's thighs and slammed into him.</p><hr/><p>Genma saw stars, the blunt head of Raidou's cock glancing his prostate with every thrust now. There were hands, rough and calloused, marking paths down his body, and flexing thighs against the backs of his, relentless, and Raidou's cock in his ass and all he could feel and smell and see was Raidou and he thought he was going to go mad from it.</p><p>He was distantly aware of the choked, desperate noises in his throat, and his pre-cum trickling down Raidou's fist, too caught up in Raidou's bruising grip and Raidou's throaty growls and the feeling of him as deep as he could be inside Genma to care about inhibitions. </p><p>Raidou leaned over him, used the hand that had been around Genma's cock to wrap around his neck and squeezed lightly. The lightheaded hazy lack of oxygen amplified every feeling ten-folds and Genma didn't think he could last much longer.</p><p>Teeth sunk into his lips as Raidou kissed him again, passion and arousal lending an edge to his thrusts.</p><p>Genma couldn't take more. The need to burst at the seams, to fall apart, was too intense to ignore. He reached around Raidou to grab his ass and urged him faster. "Please— more of you, all of you— please—"</p><p>Raidou's rhythmic steady pace snapped, and suddenly his hips were ramming into Genma.</p><p>Genma made an intelligible sound, dug his nails in Raidou's back hard enough to draw blood, and felt himself lose a fight.</p><p>Raidou's fingertips at his cockhead sent off a chain reaction. Genma's balls drew tight, and then everything inside him exploded and lit up like a dying star bursting to a million shattered pieces.</p><p>His cries rose, gasping and thin and he clamped a hand over his mouth trying valiantly to swallow some of them as his body quacked and he came all over Raidou's abs and chest, long and hard, spurred on even more by the feeling of Raidou's seed spilling inside him.</p><p>They came together, Genma stuffed and raw and filled to the brink with Raidou's essence, and Raidou covered with Genma's cum and growling at every shudder that transferred from Genma's frame to his.</p><p>“Oh gods, <em> hah—fuck,</em>” Raidou’s hips ground against his as he rode out his high, until he crashed down on Genma, gasping into his hair. </p><p>Fingertips grazed his scalp, then tangled within his hair and with some effort, Raidou’s weight lifted to press their lips together in a sated kiss. A press of lips more than anything, messy and wet. </p><p>Genma’s hands trailed up Raidou’s sides as Raidou gently eased out of Genma. He didn’t let him move too far however, legs sliding sensually up his thighs and pressing their bodies together. After-tingles still danced on his skin that even this simple contact was enough to send his heart racing. </p><p>“Stay,” Genma muttered, burying his face in Raidou’s neck, against damp skin. “Stay like this for a while.”</p><p>Raidou’s cheek pressed against his as he regained his breath, fingers toying with a strand, curling and uncurling it around his middle finger. “Okay,” Raidou said, lips pressing lightly over Genma’s temple. His hand smoothed up and down Genma’s thigh, which helped Genma back down to earth.</p><p>When he eased the deathgrip he had on Raidou, Raidou rolled on his side, gathering Genma in his arms and pressed him against his chest. “Are you okay?”</p><p>“Mhm,” Genma said, drawing abstract shapes on Raidou’s shoulder. “‘m fine. More’an fine.”</p><p>Raidou chuckled, twisting his fingers in Genma’s hair. “You need a nap soldier?”</p><p>“Shh,” Genma murmured lazily.</p><p>It earned him another chuckle and a soothing caress. “That was perfect,” Raidou murmured, his fingertips trailing down Genma’s arm. “More than perfect.</p><p>“Mmm,” Genma buried into him. “Can we stay like this a little longer?”</p><p>Everything inside him spontaneously softened into a happy, melted puddle. “Yes,” he said, and wished he could stay like this a lot longer, for days or weeks if it took. “As long as you want.”</p><p>He watched eyelashes flutter shut with reverence that he could witness this, that he could hold Genma, that he was allowed to have him, and swore to himself he wouldn’t squander a moment.</p><p>He wasn’t going to let anything ruin this. Not even himself. </p><p> </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thoughts? Any at all? Feedback sounds pretty amazing. 🙏🏼💖</p></blockquote></div></div>
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